Stop Asking for Feedback—It’s the Pebble Killing Your Creative Flow

Let them think.

You finish first.

You learn by finishing—by walking the whole path, even when a pebble nags at your heel.

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I’ve grown more—as a writer, artist, creator—when I give myself the patience to “complete the thing” before I invite anyone else into it. Oh, this is so powerful for you to understand. Let me show you why.

Banner showing a foot pressing on a pebble beneath a boot with message about protecting creative flow.

The Temptation to Seek Feedback Too Soon

There is an apprehension that creeps in when you are working on something you’re not sure of how to finish. Most creative projects are like this. Maybe, it’s a part of my brain overthinking others’ judgment—of an opinion that I have yet to hear.

Does this make sense? When I’m starting a project, the motivation is high—The start is strong; you’re excited to dive in—Whatever it is, working on a miniature painting, a writing project…a blog post.

But, then that intrusive thought seeps in, asking you to find out whether you’re doing a good job or not. Whether it is a sense of a need for perfectionism, or just an insecurity you need to scratch, it’s a thorn you can’t seem to pull from your side.

Illustration of a person walking forward through a crowd of critics toward a glowing light bulb — Keep walking toward your ideas, not the noise around you.

That’s the worry, while you’re working; you’re asking yourself—is this worth my time? Is it actually what I want to create? As you work on whatever creative piece you’re exerting your precious effort on, you’re slowly losing confidence.

And, here, in this moment, the strongest temptation is to ask someone else for affirmation, validation that you’re on the right track.

The Let Them Theory Book cover, green with black and bright contrast letters by Mel Robbins — A fascinating way to frame how to approach feedback from others… presented in a best selling book. I’m still working my way through this one. The idea is to remind ourselves to release control over others’ opinions.

The Pebble in Your Shoe

But this is the problem:

Feeling the pebble.

It won’t fill the gap in your mind—breaking flow. It only feeds it. It is the feedback, the opinion of others that so makes you fidget that will cause you to feel worse.

Top-down view of brown suede shoe with a pebble resting on the insole. pebble in shoe metaphor for feedback breaking creative flow — Big or small, this is the distraction that keeps creators from finishing their work.

Have you ever had a pebble intrude into your shoe while hiking a trail or as you’re walking to some destination? That tiny, tiny, hard object that the soles of your feet can’t avoid; it can’t be taken out unless you stop your progress.

To remove the pebble, you have to STOP walking—progress stops.

“The momentum is broken when you stop for feedback.”

Yet, in this metaphorical example, the pebble is that elusive, oh so intrusive thought, and it isn’t real. The worry you have is an illusion. Your mind or emotional heart placed it there—and it makes zero sense.

Keep Walking, Don’t Stop. Finish.

But, it has to go away, right?

Well, if you want to keep creating, this pebble that we will call it now is the thing we’re talking about. The reality is your constant worry, the need to hear others’ opinion of your work mid-stream is counterproductive.

Listen up: People’s opinions are not helpful. You have it within you to do the thing!

Four-panel comic of an artist learning to finish their project before seeking feedback — Every idea starts bright—don’t let early feedback dim the spark

The only people whose opinions matter are 1) those who pay you money to do the job (in which case you either have the tools/talent to do the task, or not) or 2) the people you surrender your autonomy to (which is bad).

Keep walking. Keep working. The pebble not only won’t go away; but if you stop to try and take it out (the proverbial asking someone what they think; getting others’ feedback) will stop you in your tracks—this will slow you down—and halt your progress.

“Keep walking. Keep working.”

Also, that slight relief you may get by trying to remove this elusive pebble (that thought in your mind) is only temporary. And, after a moment, after you put your shoe back on, you’ll realize you need to readjust and find your walking pace again.

Protect Your Flow

When creating something this is also known as breaking your flow. The art of creating, of working well, pleasurably, really, is momentum. The momentum is broken when you stop for feedback from other people.

Close-up of brown shoe with a small pebble inside the heel, symbolizing creative discomfort — *That small, nagging doubt—don’t stop for it.*

My advice from walking oh so many steps in so many places, work, hobbies, art, sports, is to keep going. Keep walking, keep doing, until you really finish what you sought out to do.

Finishing Is the Real Achievement

Get to the finish line. Yes, whatever you’re working on may “suck” in your mind. It may be messy in your view, incomplete, or even just wrong. But the finishing, the completing of any project without getting that external feedback, without stopping, is an achievement in and of itself.

Fight to the end. Get to the point where you have nothing left within you. You’ve completely exhausted every skill, talent, intellectual and emotional reserve you have. Then, here, ask for help or input from others.

Summary: Why early feedback interrupts your creative flow

You know that moment when you’re in it—fully immersed, paintbrush moving, words spilling out, the idea still wild and alive? That’s your creative flow. It’s fragile.

The second you reach for feedback, you step out of it. Suddenly, you’re performing instead of exploring. You start thinking about how your work looks instead of how it feels.

Early feedback kills momentum. It replaces intuition with hesitation. And once you start editing before you’ve even finished creating, you trade discovery for approval.

Protect your creative flow. Let the idea breathe before you invite the world in.

Even business leaders struggle with the usefulness of feedback. See “Stop Asking for Feedback” – Harvard Business Review for a different perspective on timing and context.

Final Word: “Own the Outcome”

When you do this, I’ve learned that everyone discovers something about themselves. And, more importantly, they own it. They can take up that mantle alone (alone being the key word) that they did it themselves. This builds confidence that is forever yours, and oh so precious.

The next time you’re stuck in a project, keep going. Envision the end, but fight your way to that vision without asking for opinions or feedback, and see if you can get there. Of course, ask for a helping hand, maybe a tool you think you need, or a resource, but not an opinion on the actual product/piece you’re trying to complete.

The vision is yours. Own it. Finish it. Then, allow judgment from yourself and others. And of course, learn from it and make it better.

Well, what do you think? Do you tend to ask for help/feedback too early in the creative process? Writing, painting, or making something new and keep getting hung up on what others may think? Leave a comment!